Old Man Tendencies

2025-09-07

I do feel myself having some old man tendencies. Just being a stereotypical old man, and sometimes I try to fight it, but sometimes I allow it.

Some examples:

I try to take a bucket, the cheap home depot ones, and a grabber when I go on walks with our sons to pick up trash around our block. I think I remember my grandfather, my dad’s dad, doing this (he also picked up cans and bottles to recycle them) and I am doing the same now. I really dont like trash, I really value the Japanese kind of values around keeping the public spaces clean and try to emulate it. https://www.japanlivingguide.com/expatinfo/japaneseculture/japanese-cleanliness/ Everyone should be responsible for their own trash, but given the lack of responsibility I will begrudgingly clean up for others.

One more:

Yesterday I went to the library with our oldest, Sneha and the baby were sleeping so it was just the two of us. We got there, saw some geese, returned a book in a super cool sliding mechanism (our oldest loves returning the books perhaps more than getting new books). Then we walked inside, walked past row of children looking at books on a Saturday. It was pretty hot outside so the inside of the library, with its industrial AC, was a nice cool respite from the weather. And we hear a commotion coming from a play area where there is a little play structure where our oldest has played before, kids are running and having fun. So we both walk over and we see a scene. The main plastic structure is full of books, a large mound of perhaps 50 books and 50 magazines. And some kid comes up to me, says something that I no longer remember, grabs a handful of books off a random shell, and throws them into the plastic structure.

I was a little shocked at the scene, my brain did not process it for a few moments. I just stood, trying to understand what was happening. Eventually, it was probably only a few seconds, I got my bearing. This kid and his brother had decided to make a fort out of book and no one stopped them, their grandma (I assume) stood by but were not very strict (or something) and so the kid just did what every they wanted.

My first words were: ‘this is not right’. And then I got on my hands and knees and pulled stacks of books out of the play structure. Thankfully a parent and a different kid came to my aid and helped me organize the books. Even the kid causing the chaos tried to help me get the books out the play structure. And it took a few minutes, maybe 5 whole minutes, but we got all of the books out and I did try to give bits of advice to the kid causing the chaos: ‘hey books dont go here’ and ‘lets not do this next time’. And it was nice, the librarians didn’t have to help out, we as a community of adults could do some cleaning, etc.

But I do feel myself aging a little, I try to speak my mind a little more, I try to do the right thing a little more vs doing the easy thing. Hopefully these are some good traits to pick up.

-Gary